* This is a decidedly lighter post, because it’s a holiday weekend, and I did something horribly unladylike last night and got very drunk. I am tired, and by tired I mean hungover.*
So a lot of guys (males) wanted to weigh-in on my last post because it hurt their feelings or something. As the kids say, “Sorrynotsorry.”
My last post was in response to a really moronic, lesbophobic, woman-hating drawing by some dude who bothers women on the internet. He reserves most of his vitriol for activist Cathy Brennan who is, according to this guy, omnipresent. However, it’s quite clear from his online behavior that he and his followers basically hate all women who do not cater to his ladycharade or support his delusions.
I recently was apprised of the fact that this dude wrote a “rebuttal” to a section of my last post. His response is really poorly written and lacks even a modicum of intellectual rigor, but here is my favorite part.
“All cultures had gender stereotypes” — so? What’s his fucking point? Because all cultures had them they’re “good”? Because all cultures had them they’re “just”? Guess what, Einstein, no one claims that the trans community “invented” gender stereotypes. Many women, however, claim that gender stereotypes (that the trans community, heterosexuals, and misogynists worship) are harmful to women and must be eradicated if women are to have a fighting chance at true liberation. And though I’m not as well versed in the nuances of feminist theory as he, and most other men, I’m preeeety sure that women didn’t invent patriarchy.
“You do not represent the lesbian community, the feminist community, blah blah blah ad nauseum.” I like the all caps. Really drives his point home. All great writers employ this technique. Anyway, I appreciate him telling me that I “haven’t suffered.” I’m relieved to hear this. Those who know and love me will also be relieved to hear this. Can’t wait to call my ma and let her know.
Also, I wonder if he knows that “you haven’t suffered” is a trope men have used for centuries to convince women that they actually love their oppression.
Furthermore, I had no idea that I was Cathy Brennan, because I’m NOT.
I’m sure it’s very distressing for this man to know that more than one woman disagrees with his bullshit, transparent ideology. It must be comforting to believe that all dissent is created and manufactured by one woman.I mean, I know I would much rather believe that this dude/wordsmith is the only misogynist, obnoxious male on the planet, but whenever possible, I tend to ascribe to reality.
After crafting that exhaustingly belligerent “send up” of my post about abuse of women, brother took a moment to muse on why women like me blog under pseudonyms:
(Quick grammar FYI: “it’s” is the word you’re looking for; “its” is possessive.)
I know this may crumble his delusions, but most of us “remain hidden” because men do abhorrent things to women who disagree with them. I mean, this guy with his male rage and sexist language seems like a great, likeable, trustworthy fellow, just like this guy who likes his posts:
So why do we stay hidden? ^^ Hmmm. Take a fucking guess, genius!
Here’s a suggestion to my dudebro admirer: how about you direct some of that seething hatred of lesbians toward people who actually harm trans folks — you know, MEN. Start an organization. Hold coffee clatches. Have tea parties. Do ladies things and address the real problems your community faces. Or, you could start a blog of your very own where you rationally, and calmly respond to your detractors.
And by the way, I’d like to just say that this blog is not for or about trans folks. This is a blog for and about women; this is a blog about deconstructing ideology that is harmful to women. I’m not seeking male approval. I’m not inflicting violence, or threatening to inflict violence — I’m a woman, articulating her informed perspective. In a patriarchal world, the latter, I realize, is quite threatening.
Carry on, then.