This shit is getting really old. Like, seriously.
So anyway, the Huffington Post, a piece of shit online rag that when they’re not publishing articles like “Fifty Babies Who Just Can’t With This Lemur” and “Forty-six soup recipes to try before you die” (or is that Buzzfeed? Same difference), gives a platform to males who hate lesbians.
The most recent addition to the Huffington Post’s catalog of lesbophobic nonsense, written by a person named Dana Beyer, is “Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner: Lesbian Trans Exclusion Gets Noticed.”
Bet you’ll NEVER EVER GUESS what this article is about! (Hint: it’s not about leaving lesbians the fuck alone.)
**Seriously, this shit is starting to make me want to take drugs. Hard drugs. Keith-Richards-With-A-Death-Wish drug consumption.***
So this piece of journalism (do I smell a Peabody for HuffPo???) begins where all such bullshit begins – with MichFest, and how low-down and mean the lesbians are for not letting people who “feel like ladies” into their space. The author calls MichFest the “tip of the iceberg” for dudes who want to be lesbians. (Honestly, sometimes I can’t blame these dudes – being a lesbian is pretty fucking awesome.) And then Beyer goes on to say, “The next layer down is populated by the women who’ve spent the past four decades wasting their energy hating trans women. Their numbers include Lisa Vogel, the founder of MichFest and its director since its inception.” (He also names Janice Raymond, Sheila Jefferies, Cathy Brennan – because he’s also under the delusion that these women are the only women on planet Earth that aren’t interested in buying the fuckery he’s peddling.)
Okay, let’s clear this up, Lisa Vogel (I’m guessing) didn’t start MichFest after a night of hand-wringing and evil scheming about ways to exclude trans women – because, sorry guys, it’s NOT ABOUT YOU. It’s never been about you, and god willing, it never will be. I know it’s terribly distressing for ladybrained men that women get ONE WHOLE WEEK where they are free from the kind of bullshit that males, like Beyer, whine about constantly. I know that people like Beyer believe “real ladies” should go out of their way to avail themselves to men and men who feel like ladies, and that they see it as a personal affront when we don’t do that, but MichFest ISN’T about men, and it isn’t about the special fancy post-modern identities you invented in World of Warcraft, and it isn’t about straight people – it’s about women, females, girls. And yeah, it’s also about lesbians.
I know people like Beyer would love to see this once yearly bastion of freedom from the endless man-a-paloooza that is a woman’s life, taken from women so that ladybrained males, otherkins and “queer” straight people can run the fuck over it the way they’ve run over our parades, and colonized our organizations. And every time one of these fuckers asks the question, “Why not trans women?” they only further demonstrate just how much they don’t GET what it’s like to be a woman. Every time they vilify spaces like MichFest, they demonstrate that they don’t GET what it’s like to be a dyke. Or maybe they DO get it, and because they’re male, they just don’t fucking care. Actually, the latter is certainly “the one.”
But the article gets “better.”
“But MichFest is only the very tip of the iceberg,” Beyer writes.
See, it’s only the “tip of the iceberg” to destroy the one place on planet Earth where lesbians can congregate without being subjected to male bullshit. THAT is only the “tip of the iceberg.” What’s the deeper part of this proverbial “iceberg”? Let’s have a guess, shall we? If you guessed that the rest of the iceberg had to do with fucking, you would be correct:
Beyer uses the term “Cotton Ceiling” (which makes me want to simultaneously vomit and punch things), and then goes on to say of the “nice lesbians” who placate him and his special feels, “any of these cisgender (non-transgender) lesbians are political allies, because, like most Americans, they believe discrimination is wrong. But on a social, personal and intimate level, trans women are invisible to them as women.”
Where do I even start?
First of all, I’m not a “cisgender (non-transgender) lesbian” – I’m a dyed in the fucking wool dyke. I’m a woman. I’m not “non-transgender” – I’ve spent my whole fucking life defaulting to male language, and I’ll be damned if I’m going to default to males on this one. I will never accept your “cis,” you’ve named me and my sisters long enough. “Non-transgender lesbian” – fuck you and the genderqueer unicorn you rode in on!
And fuck your stupid fucking presumptions. No matter how much estrogen you gobble, or how deeply you have your dick inverted, you will never know what it is to be a woman – because “swallowing copious amounts of estrogen” and “having a penis” are not experiences of womanhood, because despite what society has told you, liking sparkles and being “sensitive” does not make you female. Because female is an actual lived experience, not a fucking feeling in your sparkly little brain.
And guess what? A lesbian’s refusal to have sex with males is not a hate crime. Although, being that Beyer, and all the rest, are male, it doesn’t surprise me that these shameless fuckers who have lived the vast majority of their life as MEN have the goddamn gall to suggest that lesbians “owe it to them” to fuck them now that they’ve declared themselves “women.” Careful there, Lady McLadyson, your sick, predatory, male privilege is showing.
Seriously, dudes. If you want to “play girl,” by all means do. If you get your rocks off fancying yourself a dyke – enjoy your fantasy. (I fully understand the “pretend game” — sometimes I like to imagine what it would be like to get the Pulitzer, or to have a million dollars – shit, sometimes I even ACT like I have a million dollars. Sadly, there’s no surgery I can have to make me look more like a Pulitzer-Prize Winner or drugs to take that will make me feel more like a millionaire – so count your blessings, boys.)
But, my ladybrained brothers, if you want to politicize lesbian spaces, in order to destroy them, if you want to – as a straight male – whine about how lesbians won’t fuck you, then you can go to hell. Seriously.
Now I’m off to beat my head against a wall.